(Originally published 18 Oct 2013)
It's been a rough few days, although it feels like longer than that. I've felt like I've been on the downward curve of the oscillating mood wave for a week or two and events this week, which I won't go into yet, have made that even harder...or should that be steeper. Today I'm going to try and get a grip on it. I'm sick and tired of being tired, of being scared, of not knowing how or what I feel, of not being able to control my own brain. It's no fun for my family and certainly no fun for me. What to do to lift this beast of burden….
I've had a bass guitar sitting in my house for more years than I care to remember. I bought it because I wanted to learn it (obviously) but, in the end, it just became a cool ornament. I'd tell people I was learning it, but I wasn't. Not really. Not at all in fact. Even buying 4-string, left-handed dust magnet in the first place was a cop-out. I picked a bass guitar just because it had less strings, so it must be easier to learn right? So there it has sat, looking all cool and gathering dust. Well no more!
Today, probably for the first time, I picked it up with the intention of actually taking my first baby step to learning it. With a little help from an eBay bargain (ok ok I bought Rocksmith for the PlayStation3), I stood up with my guitar and actually played it; well 'played it' might be a stretch, but it made some noise that sounded like notes. Real notes. In tune and everything!. Ironically the song I played along with was The Rolling Stones (I Can't Get No) Satisfaction. It felt good and, despite Mick and Keith's best efforts to tell me otherwise, I did get satisfaction. It reminded me of just how much I love music. I listen to it all the time, but now I can tentatively add 'playing it' to that list too. In the fog I've been living in lately, it was a little ray of sunshine. Amen (Corner) to that